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Unsubscribed Donna, Steve's wife

I Cancelled PlayStation Plus. The Demo Disc Is Now the Library.

I cancelled PlayStation Plus. It was about eighty dollars a year. That is roughly one second-hand game I might actually finish. The demo disc that came with the console is still here, and it does not ask for a monthly fee.

Donna has me on an Amazon diet. I am allowed to look. Looking is not buying, unless the thing is small and I can carry it past her. The Shark rating is not a quality score. It is my estimate of how well I can explain the purchase before Donna asks for the receipt.

Second console for the bathroom

about two hundred dollars. Shark rating 0.4.

The console in the den is always busy. The bathroom has a door and a towel hook. I could move the console in there during important matches. The bathmat is soft. The risk is humidity. I am willing to risk humidity.

Indoor putting green

about ninety dollars. Shark rating 0.5.

The carpet is already a putting surface if I believe in it. This would make it official. I would practice while games load. The demo disc loads fast, so I would get in maybe one putt. One putt is still a putt.

Shark fin controller shell

about twenty-five dollars. Shark rating 0.6.

The controller works. It just does not look like me. A fin on the back would remind the room who is playing. The room knows. The fin would be for me.

Gaming chair with built-in cooler

about four hundred dollars. Shark rating 0.7.

I do not need a chair. I need a place to sit that also respects the long game. The cooler is for water. Mostly water. The kind of water that comes in a can and has a label.

Projector for the garage wall

about three hundred dollars. Shark rating 0.8.

The garage wall is big and blank. The TV is small and has a stand. If I project the game onto the garage, I can see enemies before they see me. The car is in the way. The car can move.

Neon sign that says game over

about one hundred twenty dollars. Shark rating 0.9.

It would go above the console. Not for decoration. For closure. When I finish the second-hand game, the sign tells the room the session is over. Donna asked who turns it off. I said the winner.

Floor-standing arcade cabinet

about two thousand dollars. Shark rating 1.0.

The demo disc is a taste. The arcade cabinet is a commitment. Guests could use it. We do not have guests, but the possibility is there. The dryer has been behaving lately.

Retro game magazine subscription

about thirty dollars a year. Shark rating 1.1.

This is research. I need to know which second-hand game to finish. The magazine has pictures and opinions. I will not read the ads. It is paper, so it cannot auto-renew.

Soundbar for the den

about one hundred fifty dollars. Shark rating 1.2.

The TV speakers make the game sound like it is happening in a tin can. A soundbar would make it happen in the den. I only need it loud enough to hear the footsteps. My ears are not directional.

Massage recliner

about six hundred dollars. Shark rating 1.3.

Long sessions need support. The recliner would support my back, my legs, and my case. It has a cup holder. The cup holder is not for cups. It is for the can of water.

Mini fridge for the den

about one hundred eighty dollars. Shark rating 1.4.

The kitchen is far. The walk takes time. A mini fridge would save the walk. Donna said we already have a fridge. I said yes, and it is in the kitchen. She said that is where fridges go.

Shark-shaped beanbag chair

about eighty dollars. Shark rating 1.5.

The beanbag is shaped like a shark. This is not a joke. It is furniture that matches the household. It looks like a stuffed animal that gave up. That is the point.

Driftwood controller stand

about forty dollars. Shark rating 1.6.

The controller needs a home. The coffee table is not a home, it is a parking lot. A piece of driftwood would give it a natural place to rest. We live nowhere near the ocean. The internet delivers driftwood.

Blue LED strip lights

about twenty-five dollars. Shark rating 1.7.

The room is too bright. Games are supposed to be dim. Blue lights would make the room feel like a place where a demo disc matters. The room already looks like an aquarium. This would make it official.

Capture card for recording gameplay

about one hundred fifty dollars. Shark rating 1.8.

I need to record my progress. Not for streaming. For evidence. When I finish the game, I can show the ending. The ending is the best part.

Green screen for commentary

about seventy dollars. Shark rating 1.9.

If I record the gameplay, I might need to explain it. A green screen lets me stand in front of the game and point at things. I do not do commentary yet. I am preparing for the option.

Microphone arm

about forty dollars. Shark rating 2.0.

The microphone needs to be near my mouth. My arm gets tired. The arm does not get tired. I am not a broadcaster. The arm is for when I am.

Streaming headset

about ninety dollars. Shark rating 2.1.

The headset has a microphone and a mute button. The mute button is the important part. Donna said I already have headphones. I said these headphones come with a mute button that I control, not her.

Racing wheel

about one hundred twenty dollars. Shark rating 2.2.

One of the demos has a car. The controller works, but it does not have a wheel. A wheel would make the car demo more honest. The car demo is the whole game I have.

Foot pedals for the racing wheel

about fifty dollars. Shark rating 2.3.

The wheel is not complete without pedals. You cannot drive with a wheel and no pedals. You can, but it is not driving. The pedals make the maybe a yes.

Arcade stick

about eighty dollars. Shark rating 2.4.

Fighting games need a stick. I do not have a fighting game. I have a demo disc. But if a fighting game appears at a good price, I will be ready. Being ready is not the same as buying.

Fight pad

about forty dollars. Shark rating 2.5.

The arcade stick is for the arcade feel. The fight pad is for the couch feel. They are different. I can have both and only use one at a time. That is called rotation.

Controller carry case

about thirty dollars. Shark rating 2.6.

The controller travels from the den to the living room. That is travel. A case would protect it. The controller does not leave the house. It leaves the room. That is still travel.

Charging dock

about twenty-five dollars. Shark rating 2.7.

The controller dies at the worst time. The worst time is when I am about to finish something. A dock keeps it ready. Plugging it in works too. The dock makes it look intentional.

Rechargeable batteries

about twenty dollars. Shark rating 2.8.

The dock charges the controller. The batteries are for everything else. The remote, the clock, the small shark that tells the temperature. We have batteries. We have batteries that are not rechargeable. That is the problem.

Battery organizer

about fifteen dollars. Shark rating 2.9.

If I have rechargeable batteries, I need to know which ones are charged. An organizer has slots. I will label the slots. Donna said I will not label the slots. I said the organizer has a label maker slot.

Cable labels

about ten dollars. Shark rating 3.0.

The cables behind the TV are a nest. A nest is fine for birds. I need to know which cable goes to the console and which goes to the lamp. Labels would solve this. The lamp cable is the one with the lamp on it. Labels are faster.

Surge protector

about twenty dollars. Shark rating 3.1.

The console is expensive. The house is expensive. A surge protector protects both. It also gives me more outlets. We have outlets. We have outlets in the wall, not in a row on the floor.

TV wall mount

about forty dollars. Shark rating 3.2.

The TV sits on a stand. The stand takes up space. The wall does not. If the TV is on the wall, the console gets the whole top of the shelf. The TV is fine. Fine is not mounted.

HDMI cable

about ten dollars. Shark rating 3.3.

The cable that came with the console is short and mysterious. A longer cable would let me put the console where it belongs. It belongs not on the floor.

Screen cleaning kit

about twelve dollars. Shark rating 3.4.

The screen has fingerprints. Some are mine. Some are not. A cleaning kit would remove the evidence and improve the picture. The picture is fine. The fingerprints are not.

Controller cleaning brush

about eight dollars. Shark rating 3.5.

The controller has crumbs in the seams. The brush gets them out. I should not eat over the controller. The brush is how I eat over the controller responsibly.

Grip covers

about ten dollars. Shark rating 3.6.

The controller gets slippery during important moments. Grip covers would help me hold on. I have hands. Hands are not rubberized.

Thumbstick caps

about eight dollars. Shark rating 3.7.

The thumbsticks are worn. Caps would make them new again. The controller is new. The thumbsticks have seen things.

Replacement controller

about sixty dollars. Shark rating 3.8.

The current controller works. It just has a drift. A replacement would not drift. Donna said the drift is because I dropped it. I said the replacement would not be dropped until at least the second week.

Memory card

about thirty dollars. Shark rating 3.9.

Games need saves. The console has some memory. Some is not enough for a second-hand game and my record of the demo disc. I do not need to save the demo disc. The demo disc is where I am now.

Demo disc sleeve

about six dollars. Shark rating 4.0.

The demo disc came with the console and has been loose on the shelf. A sleeve would keep it clean. It costs less than a coffee. The disc is free. The scratch is expensive.

Second-hand game I might finish

about thirty dollars. Shark rating 4.8.

This is the plan. One game. Not ten. One. I will play it from the start to the credits. I will not buy another until I am done. Donna said she has heard this before. I said this time the demo disc has prepared me.

Socks

about twelve dollars. Shark rating 5.0.

My socks have holes. The holes are not part of the game. New socks would keep my feet warm while I finish the one game. They also cost less than the subscription. Donna said socks are a reasonable purchase. I said I know. That is why I saved them for last.

The arcade cabinet is still in the cart.

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