Adobe Creative Cloud was costing me about sixty dollars a month. That is roughly seven hundred and twenty dollars a year. I cancelled it on a Tuesday, in the middle of the afternoon, the way you would cancel anything you were not using. I have not used it. I have also not made anything yet. That is the part I want to be clear about before the list starts.
about two million dollars. Shark rating 0.4.
I would not go inside it. I would film it from the water, circling. That is the establishing shot for the documentary about the submarine. Donna asked what documentary. I said the one I am going to make.
Harris hawk and the falconry permit
about four thousand dollars. Shark rating 0.4.
Birds are the hardest thing to film, because birds do not take direction. If I own the bird, I control the schedule. The hawk is not a pet. The hawk is a crew member.
about nine hundred dollars. Shark rating 0.5.
Every studio has one. It goes on the wall behind the desk. When the interviews happen, and they will happen, the sign will already be there. Buying it later means buying it during the interview, which is unprofessional.
about six thousand dollars. Shark rating 0.5.
Print is not dead. I would print my own business cards. I do not have business cards yet, but I would need them for when the work exists, and I would rather the cards be letterpressed than not.
about four hundred thousand dollars. Shark rating 0.6.
The beam. There is no cheaper way to get the beam. Everything else on this list is in service of the beam, when you think about it.
about three hundred dollars. Shark rating 0.6.
Goats are good in b-roll. Everybody uses dogs. Nobody is using goats, and that is an opening.
about seven hundred dollars. Shark rating 0.7.
For the maritime episode. Donna said there is no maritime episode. I said there will be a maritime episode, and it will be better with a helmet in it.
about five thousand dollars. Shark rating 0.8.
You cannot shoot at night without heat. I will be shooting at night. This is settled. Donna asked who said anything about night. I said the night did.
about two hundred dollars. Shark rating 0.9.
Atmosphere. I have located the smoke detector in the garage and I have agreed to respect it. This is a promise and it is in writing now.
Green paint for the entire garage
about four hundred dollars. Shark rating 0.9.
Any wall that is not green is a wall I have to fix in post. Painting is cheaper than fixing. That is the whole argument and I do not have a second one.
about eight thousand dollars. Shark rating 1.0.
The flares. You know the flares. I want the flares.
about thirty thousand dollars. Shark rating 1.1.
I need something to put the lenses on. Donna said buy the camera or the lenses, not both. I bought the lenses first. At this point the camera is not a purchase, it is a consequence.
about twelve hundred dollars. Shark rating 1.2.
Movement. A camera that does not move is a photograph, and if I wanted a photograph I would not have cancelled the editing software.
about four hundred dollars. Shark rating 1.3.
The slider only works on rails. The gimbal is for when there are no rails. These are two different problems and I am not going to pretend they are one problem.
about two hundred dollars. Shark rating 1.4.
It holds things. Right now nothing holds anything in this house, which is why the lamps are on the floor. Sandbags are separate and I am aware of that.
about six hundred dollars. Shark rating 1.5.
For the still photography I will also be doing. The video camera cannot do stills. I checked, and then I checked again, because I did not like the answer.
about one hundred fifty dollars. Shark rating 1.6.
A bare strobe is a small sun with opinions. The softbox is what makes it polite. You cannot interview a person under a small sun with opinions.
about one hundred twenty dollars. Shark rating 1.7.
The paper is for the background. The paper gets dirty. So I bought four rolls. Donna asked how the paper gets dirty if I have not used it. I said it is a known problem with paper.
about five thousand dollars. Shark rating 1.8.
Narration. I will be narrating this. Nobody else can narrate it, because nobody else knows what happened, and most of what happened is that I bought a vocal booth.
about three hundred dollars. Shark rating 1.9.
For the narration. The booth does not come with a microphone. I found that out after the booth was ordered, which was not the ideal order of operations, but the booth is here now.
about four hundred dollars. Shark rating 2.0.
Sound outdoors, sound in the kitchen, sound in the car. The recorder does not care where it is. That is the appeal.
about two hundred dollars. Shark rating 2.1.
For interviews. I will be interviewing people. About what, Donna asked. That is a problem for a later date and a different list.
about one hundred twenty dollars. Shark rating 2.2.
To hold the shotgun microphone over the subject. The alternative is an arm. An arm gets tired at the eleven minute mark and the boom pole does not.
about three hundred dollars. Shark rating 2.3.
So I can hear what I have made. Currently I can hear what other people have made, which is not the same thing and has never been the same thing.
about five hundred dollars. Shark rating 2.4.
Headphones are for one person. Speakers are for when Donna wants to hear it too. Donna has not asked to hear anything. I would like to be ready for the day she does.
about two hundred dollars. Shark rating 2.5.
The headphones and the speakers do not plug into each other. Somebody has to fix that. This fixes that.
about eight hundred dollars. Shark rating 2.6.
Drawing directly on the screen. This is the closest thing on the list to actual creating, which is why it is this far down. I am aware. I am aware of it.
about two hundred fifty dollars. Shark rating 2.7.
If the colors are one thing on Tuesday and a different thing on Wednesday, that is not art, that is a monitor problem, and I would like the monitor problem gone before the art starts.
about one thousand dollars. Shark rating 2.8.
You cannot calibrate a monitor that was not built to be calibrated. I learned this after the calibrator arrived. That one is on me.
about two hundred dollars. Shark rating 2.9.
The footage has to go somewhere. Right now the footage goes nowhere, because there is no footage, but I would like the somewhere to be in place before the footage arrives.
about six hundred dollars. Shark rating 3.0.
Two drives in a box in the closet. If the work is lost, it is not work, it is a memory. I heard someone say that and I have been unable to stop thinking about it.
about one hundred fifty dollars. Shark rating 3.1.
Editing is mostly keyboard. The clicking tells me it happened. Without the clicking I am just pressing and hoping.
about two hundred dollars. Shark rating 3.2.
Twelve hours a day. Posture. Donna said twelve hours a day is the problem and the stool is not the problem. I have heard her. I am buying the stool.
about seven hundred dollars. Shark rating 3.3.
Standing is better than sitting, or at least alternating is better, and the desk alternates. I explained the entire thing from the beginning. Donna said, and I am quoting her, just buy the damn thing.
about one hundred eighty dollars. Shark rating 3.4.
A lamp that does not make everything look orange. The current lamp makes everything look orange. I have been editing nothing under an orange light and it is still wrong.
about eighty dollars. Shark rating 3.5.
Everything above is plugged into one outlet. The outlet is the weakest point in the entire studio. This is the only item on the list that protects the rest of the list.
about fifteen dollars. Shark rating 3.7.
Cables on the floor are a trip hazard and also a look. Two problems, one purchase. Donna has me on an Amazon diet. Cable ties are a supply, not a purchase. I have made this argument before and I will make it again.
about twelve dollars. Shark rating 3.9.
For the ideas. The ideas arrived before the equipment did, which is inconvenient, and they are currently living in my head where I cannot sort them.
about nine dollars. Shark rating 4.1.
The notebook did not come with one. This is the third time I have learned this and I would like it to be the last time.
about thirty dollars. Shark rating 4.3.
For the eyes. Donna says the eyes are not the problem, the hours are the problem, and she says it every time. We have been through this and I suspect we will be through it again.
about twenty dollars. Shark rating 5.0.
The desk is in the garage and the garage is cold. Socks are the one item on this list that does not require a follow up purchase. They arrive in a pack. They are finished the moment they arrive. Nothing else here can say that.
Donna asked when the creating starts. I told her I need to sort the cables first.